Only thin crowds turned out for last weekend’s basketball homestand against Metlakatla. That was a shame.
The Haines teams didn’t win but they played well against Met, an aggressive and longtime rival.
Two Haines friends who have watched prep hoops all over Alaska remarked that besides being thin, the crowds were quiet compared to in other towns, where they are deafening. Don’t ask me why.
A hoops game is as cheap and healthy as yucks get on a Haines Saturday night. Plus it’s a legitimate opportunity to scream one’s bloody lungs out, which most of us could use at mid-winter. It beats yelling at your spouse, your kids or your dog. If you don’t believe me, ask them.
I started at hoops games as a news reporter with zero knowledge or interest in the game. My reporting typically followed this line: “Haines was ahead. Then Metlakatla was ahead. Then Haines was ahead. Then Metlakatla won. Don’t ask my why.” Then I’d report who scored and how many points, the one part I could get right.
After a few years of this, my sports reporting remained lousy but I knew enough locals at games that besides reporting, I could score a few news tips during small talk. After I got married, my Australian wife would come to games, but only for the “pageantry,” which is how she describes the cheerleaders and halftime show. People of British ancestry never tire of pageantry. The Royal Family makes bank on this. Don’t ask me why.
Eventually, I fell in with the pep band, where the pros hang out. The musicians play a bunch of peppy songs before the game and during halftime, then, just as the court action heats up, they walk out of the gym for some snacks like they got better things going in the lobby. They eventually saunter back into the gym, but with a certain icy elan that says, “Hey, man, this is just my weekend gig.”
As I’ve lost my embouchure I can no longer sit in with those cats, so last week I joined the student section, where a person is expected to stomp the bleachers, spill their popcorn, and do whatever silly things the cheerleaders tell them to. My friend Krystal was there, and as she has a lot of kids, she screamed a lot, and so did I.
We had great fun. Don’t ask me why.